Just cropdusted the office
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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