Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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