Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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