Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
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