I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
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