what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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