no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
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just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
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Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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