my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
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i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
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