No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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