My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Randomize