Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
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