I want to have your abortion
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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