And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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