Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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