The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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