You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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