she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I love you.
Bad choice
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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