He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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