No, you can still breathe under the balls.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
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She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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