everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
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i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
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Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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