if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize