Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
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