How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
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There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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