There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Randomize