on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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