Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
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Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
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Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I'm like, not good at living.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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