I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
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