There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize