If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
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The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
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He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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