i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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