do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
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