yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize