Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize