her vagine was all disorganized.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize