Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
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