And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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