Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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