At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize