We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize