your parents love me but you hate me
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize