It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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