Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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