i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize