One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
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