I think i peed on brittanys purse
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize