My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize