I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize