so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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