tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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