The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dicks are not precious.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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